Friday, December 21, 2007

Smoking Hickory

False Alarm. I've actually quit smoking. Cold Turkey. It's been about a month now, and the cravings have somewhat subsided to a dull throbbing, on the level of getting a tattoo, piercing, or sexually transmitted disease. Still, I persist, out of an unsubstantiated, vague feeling that it'll be worth it.

I miss smoking. I rather enjoyed it, and it gave me an excuse to get out of the office, or the house, or to escape from whatever awkward situation that I might find myself in. Also it keeps you thin, you catch fewer colds, and it makes you look cool. But there were many reasons to quit. Not least of which was Son. He's getting to an impressionable age (in fact, I may have left it a little late), and of the vast Augean stables of vice that may serve as "bad examples" to him, smoking was probably in the top ten.

But one sin that I absolutely will not abandon, and for which I refuse to feel guilty, is my enduring - some would say "unnatural" - love of bacon. To quote Jim Gaffigan, bacon is the fairy dust of the food world. There is virtually no food that cannot be improved by the addition of this delicious smoked pork product. It is single-handedly responsible for my ambivalence toward vegetarianism.

And so it was with semi-Pavlovian salivation that I read today's bacon-related post on BoingBoing. There was no lack of golden smoked-porcine deliciousness, but my favorite experiment has to be the recipe for bacon chocolate chip cookies with cinnamon frosting.

That's right. Wrinkle your nose, screw your eyes shut in disgust. You are not yet prepared for the sheer majesty of this maple-smoked epicurean madness. I will - I must - sample the forbidden delights of this latest appeal to my secret vice.

Yet I can't help but feel that some unexplored, deeper depravity beckons, perhaps in the form of some prosciutto-peppermint based fudge.

Anyhoo, I'll keep you posted.

4 uninformed opinions:

erin said...

Congratulations and good luck!

Did you know there's such a thing as bacon salt?

erin said...

sorry to ask this here, but...

how'd you change "comments" to "uninformed opinions"?
(you could email a reply to boo9ie at and delete this comment.)


Cool Ranch Luke said...

Hi Erin! Go to Template > Page Elements, and edit the "Blog Posts" Element. One of the options in there should allow you to change this (I think)...

erin said...

did you hear that? it was the sound of my hand slapping my forehead. thanks. i was thinking i'd have to go in and do some fancy fiddling with code.
i've now changed "comments" to "fish"--which is really nonsense, but it's a nice noun that can be both singular and plural.
"1 comments" was really bugging me.
i do realize how sad that is, but there you have it.